D.P IV

The last three nights of dreaming in dream land:

11/20

   I was reliving the moments that a poet friend invited me to her version of Legendary Ladies Ball. The night before we shared deep stories with our sister friends that may have changed our lives forever. (In real life I remember feeling hesitant to share anything whilst realizing that I was not alone in the dealings I've had with life) however in my dream I was more active in expressing every flaw and buried skeleton in my past with them. 
    With a particular sister friend (who is currently a piercing and tattoo professional) was holding my hand toward the end of the ceremony where we burned every bad memory in a bonfire pit. Granted, that actually happened but this time she was squeezing the shit out of my hand. It was turning beet red. No matter how had I tried to get out of her grip there was no shaking it. No one around seem to notice how uncomfortable I was and she definitely didn't notice how awkward things were becoming.
    Toward the end of the moment, her grip loosened while others threw out their memories sharing smiles, hugs and tears with one another. She looked at me and said, "NOW GO BE FREE," with a different smile I've never seen. In a blink of an eye her gaze was gone and turned to walk away with other sister friends.


11/21 
    I woke up crying or wailing and moaning if you will. My eyes were dry and I didn't exactly have the emotional feelings of sadness but in dreamland, there definitely were tears and lots of them. I don't want to write it because even now I am in denial but someone close to me passed away. Our relationship has grown since I've become an adult and he has become one of my favorite people to receive encouragment.
   The dream went quick as if I could roll over and it be over. One second we were laughing about politics, reminiscing about family and good times and then like a snap of a finger, the faint smell of hospital beds, opaque walls and despair flooded my senses. I saw him for a split second laying there with tubes running everywhere, but tears immediately drowned my vision. I felt empty and lost. In the few moments of crying out loud I awoke to an alarm sounding from my phone and just like that it was over.

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   Love and lost goes hand in hand at times. There's a saying that mentions a death resulting in a new lust for life. Think about it; during a break up the victim either delves deeper in their work or studies, or the take up a new hobby replacing the loss in place of the void. Most people begin a rigorous workout schedule with diet plans and eating habits. At least that's what I did when I went through heartbreak. That coupled with new poems completed every night to ease the pain. 
    In my first dream I think my conscious is reminding me to let go and move on. Everything I placed into that bonfire that evening was so difficult to write and in turn destroy. Little did I know that was only the beginning of the battle. I was letting go physical parts of the struggle, but emotionally moving forward is difficult and an entire new level of maturity to accept.
   The sister friend holding my hand represented the issue; her agonizing grip was the letting go part. As the pain seeped deeper in my hand, the pain symbolized how long it could stay and how ugly its pressure could destroy relationships with other people, ultimately with myself. Kind of weird saying that since I am myself and I generally love myself and get along with myself, however experience has taught me that you can't love anyone else the right way until you've done it correctly to you first. In more ways than one. ;)

 In the second dream I have realized that time is infinite and minute at the same time. We are all given the same 24 hours logically. but how we spend it differs person to person. The moments we share with loved ones, no matter how often for how ever long, does not matter when death draws near. I know it can rear its scary face regardless of age, truth is we all have to deal with its existence.. or lack thereof.  I am appreciative of every moment we have together and I'm not looking forward to that unfortunate phone call I pray to be much later than sooner but really, what can I do about it?

Thank you for reading. I don't know what the Most High has in store but I am writing everything down. I'm leaving you with a quote from Collateral Beauty, "we long for love, wish for more time and fear death."
    

Peace. Love. Light.
    

DP. III

Good afternoon readers!
   Last night's episode was full of twists and turns and 'wtf' moments. It's ironic how now that I've begun to document my dreams I can't actually sleep. After the first night I anticipated dreaming and sharing them I only slept five hours that night. So from that night on I added a new sleep regime to my routine. Hot tea and a warm shower, followed by lavender scented pillow cases and soft jazz really compliments heavy eyes after a few minutes laying there.
  I really wish I could remember enough action to share today. I did in fact dream and awoke feeling like another awesome journey conjured from my restless mind, still nothing concrete to express. So today I will discuss a few facts about how and why we dream, including lucid dreaming and how astral projection is slightly different; metaphysically and your "awaken" state.
   
OK. I WAS GOING TO EXPLAIN THESE THINGS BUT IT IS ABSOLUTELY TOO MUCH TO PARAPHRASE WITHOUT BEING CONFUSING OR LEAVING OUT A MINOR/MAJOR KEY FACTOR. 
   Just as I was outlining today's post the level of DEEP already, had me loving the idea of staying right in the shallow end. I'm thinking, "okay, I'll keep it simple and inform them about dreams and how to be a comfortable happy dreamer." That turned into discussing reality and its perception to thought and consciousness. In the words of Shrek, this topic has "layers like onions." It certainly isn't a sweet cake-walk sharing ideologies I found to be interesting and I'm just not the kind of person that will introduce something without a back story, unless it can be avoided. Frankly, dreams, reality, consciousness, lucid dreaming and astral projection, chakrah building, (shit what else) the proposal of the 'Big Bang Theory' vs teleological, ontological philosophies...
  
I just may begin a new post specifically about this topic discussing everything in chapters.

Anyway I'm out.

Peace

D.P. 2

   I'm a little hazy about last night's dream. Maybe I forced myself into dreaming and anticipating writing something down because what I remember is really foggy.

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2.14.17

Something about a car accident or moments before impact I was with my family. We were laughing and headed somewhere out of town, when something big was coming right at us from the opposite lane.

But then it faded to a new scene.

This time I was sitting at a desk in an office setting writing. My hair was wavy fanning around my shoulders and a single strand kept falling in my eye. It was very annoying.

Then it faded again.

This happened a couple more times but I just can't remember anything that happened.

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Maybe this episode is telling me that life turns on a dime. Anything can and will happen with and without God's interference, and we have to be prepared to keep going. There will be distractions. There will be times when quitting and giving up is the better answer but if you persevere through the tough times you will appreciate it in the end. We all need some aspiring story to help motivate us, why not write your own?

Walk into what the Most High has for you and WIN.

Peace,

ParaLectra Divine

Dream Psychology 1.

I have dreams almost every night and for the past month I always wake up sharing what I saw with my significant other. Playfully, he said I should document what I dream and go back to define them. I laughed it off, but his idea stuck with me. So here it is; Dream Psychology. I imagine this journey to be therapeutic as I begin to delve into deep honest parts of my mind that I believe the Most High is giving me.

For the sake of time last night will be 11pm-8am the following day, which will be the day of a new post.

Sleep Well
 
2.12.17
Last night's dream was my high school reunion.
I wore my purple senior prom dress.
My hair was loosely folded in a bun.
I had purple eyeshadow and light pink lipstick.
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I toured the old high school visiting the classrooms I once dreaded, now longing for the times my only responsibility was homework and getting home safe.

An old friend throughout my school years greeted me with smiles I immediately felt to be fake and forced. Her eyes shined a different hue than the beautiful gown she had worn. I felt jealousy. Although she was the talk of the evening, I didn't understand her silent beef with me.

I had to fake it. The time we had for the engagement was a long and drawn out one. The people remembered as old friends did not sit well with as I didn't truly connect with anyone in high school. Everyone feeling like the time was perfect for a rebirth in friendship and now getting old, I was lonely and wanted to be back where I belonged.

My significant other was not with me. I did not see him around and I wasn't alarmed.


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I believe the dream was showing my fears of not being successful by the time our high school reunion came around. All the people I remembered and called a friend are really just people I know and happen to see often until we all graduated.

The envious feelings were actually coming from me. The slight angst toward myself in not accomplishing the things I want in life thus settling upon competition I found in my own mind.

I should not be afraid of attending any reunion and go for the sake of reuniting for one night with those who are continuing to run the race of success, liberty and happiness. It does not matter who called me friend or how much I have in the bank. We are alive and still figuring out all that life has to offer.